CSI: Grace

Monday March 7th 2011

So the other week I had an audition for a crime scene investigation-type show.  And I thought “Okay, what do women on those shows wear?”  I responded to my own silent brain question with “Oh, they wear man clothes and they keep their hair down-ish to remind everyone that they have a vagina.”  And then I re-responded to my brain with “Let’s get candy!”  And then “You should really clean your bathroom first.”  And then “Oh really? You should SHUT UP.” And then…

I forgot what I was doing and checked my email again.

But I did put together this very sexually ambiguous ensemble.  The blue shirt is, in fact, a boy hand-me-down.  It’s got the yellow pit stains to prove it.  P.S.- Scientists, can you, like, get your shit together and invent a fabric that doesn’t get pit stains?  I mean, like, we have pajama pants that look like JEANS and knives that cut bricks AND tomatos but we still can’t figure out how keep our arm pits from sweating?  Like, seriously, scientists, you’re pissing me off.  And then…

I forgot what I was ranting about and checked my email again.

But I did, in keeping with Dexter’s sister-wife style, keep my hair down to allude to the fact that I am capable of bearing children. And then I threw on this pink scarf because WHY THE FUCK NOT?!  I’m wild!  I look like a crazy wild timid director! RAWR!  And then…

I didn’t get the part.  But I checked the crap out of my email.

Shirt: Boy Hand Me Down

Jeans: Forever21

Belt: Forever21

Scarf: Old Navy

Shoes: Forever21

Necklace: Christmas gift from SANTA